#4 Ways a Man Can Overcome Separation. -

As a man, father, and husband, I have overcome many adversities in my life, and there are many adversities that come in all forms, shapes, and sizes; they can go from moderate to extreme.

Separation is something no one prepares for, as later I discovered I was not immune to it.

Here are my #4 Tips for managing the separation process.

1. Keep your frame of mind.

In today’s world, society is totally against men, especially in marriage. Separation is challenging especially for those whore are getting dumbed.

Keeping your frame of mind is crucial at the very beginning of the separation; among a lot of anger, pain, and frustration, we still have to take care of our families along with ourselves.

Having a reasonable frame of mind will help you progress forward; as men, we are providers; it doesn’t matter what situation you’re we still have to provide for our children and our wives.

I focussed on my finances, and I knew that if my finances were in order, it would buy me time to get myself together while I was going through the motion of separation.

2. Surround yourself with positive people!

There comes a time when every marriage will be put to the test; this test is to define how you feel about each other. So if you’re separated, be careful who you talk to and what advice you take.

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You might still love your wife, and you are after other options you can take to solve the issues. Before you seek advice from someone, look at this person and the way they live life and see if it’s all they make to be.

Surround yourself with positive people, people that you know have you in their best interest at heart; even what you hear from them may hurt, but you will know it’s from a good place or not.

3. Focus on your priorities

As I worked through my mind trying to make sense of things and working out what just happened to me, I ensured my children had the best support I could provide.

I had to pay child support, but I knew the child support I was supposed to pay was nowhere near enough to cover my children’s everyday living expenses.

I gave my wife a lot more than I was expected to pay; the reason for this was I needed time for myself to try and work things out. The last thing I needed was to stress about food for my wife and children and a roof on their heads.

Taking care of my responsibilities to the best of my ability gave me time to think about things more clearly. If you have to pay child support, don’t be conformed to what the government tells you to pay. Pay what you know that allows you the time to get yourself together.

4. Take one step at a time.

I remember feeling overwhelmed with what was happening to my marriage; I felt weak, hopeless, and broken-hearted. At first, everything was like a blur; nothing made sense, and this wanting answers straight away drove me crazy.

I realized nothing was going to be solved straight away, and this taught me to be patient; as time went by, I learned to take one step at a time.

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There were many issues I was accused of in my marriage as I started looking at and addressing one problem at a time and what I found was the truth; they say the truth shall set you free, and it indeed it did.

When you have calmed down from the pain of loss, start addressing the issues about why you are separated and come to your truth.

It is essential to take your time with this process and not rush it; it is important to emerge yourself with issues, and only then will you come to your conclusion.


Before you decide to get a divorce, you have to be sure it is what you want, even if you feel like it is not your fault. As a man, if there is one thing we regret.

The regret of “What If” I could have done something different maybe that would have saved our marriage. I remember thinking if I were going to walk away from my marriage, I would walk away knowing I had tried everything I could.

Mattew 19:6 What God has joined together, let no one separate. The spirit of God will not wait for no man, and when his heart is ready to walk away, he will allow you to walk, and you will happily walk.

Allow yourself time, let God do his work, and when he is done, he will let you know whether to go back to your wife or it’s time to walk.

Feel free to leave a comment with your tips on how you manage a heavy situation.

By admin

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